Thursday, April 7, 2011

The Answer is evident now..

I don't know if my decision was the right thing but I followed my heart and trusted it. I told him, the guy who liked me that I'll not ready for something so big and adventurous. I know I shouldn't have said that but I need to state my point if I want us to continue begin friends. Like I said, I trusted my instincts. I don't know where they'll take me but I know that they'll guide me to where I wanna be.

I turned out that I'm not the first girl he liked. The first girl he fell in love with couldn't accept him (if I'm not wrong) and I'm the second one. I know. To many people, who are merely onlookers, might feel that I did wrong and that I should accept his request and give him a chance. But this is about me too and I hae my own set of reasons.

I'm currently very focused on my ambitions and schoolwork and I like it that way. I think love is a form of mist over your eyes, something that makes you hallucinate, I hope you understand what I'm trying to say. I don't want to risk the chamce of being blinded by love that my manga-style will become affected and such.

I draw from my heart. I feel every art work I do, no matter how ugly it is. What I draw usually reflects my personality and my childish wonder to things that my classmates won't give a thought about. But I like it that way. I think it gives a unique perspective to the way I exhibit my inner thoughts about the world around me. (I'm not praising myself. This is what my mum says about my art.)

So, _ _ _ _ _ _ I'm sorry but now is not the time. I'm not yet where I wanna be and there is many things that I treasure and believe are personally more important to me. I hope he understands.

I'll continue helping him cope with daily life (he has special needs) and I'll be there as a good friend, whenever he needs me.

That's it for today. I'll do a proper post on Saturday. And I might draw new fanart for y'all too.
Rogue Eleven out.

P.S. I tied my hair like Yuki's from Space Battleship Yamato movie version(the movie I got so obsessed with in some previous post), not the 1970s cartoon version!! Yuki rules!! She is such a brave and strong character! Gotta like Yuki, people!!


  1. about the you shouldnt part ... the guy might also not be experienced enough to do the same thing so yes you acctually is ok to tell him that:)

  2. Girl, do what you want to do! Don't feel pressured! Sounds to me like you did exactly the right thing.

    -Leia <3

  3. I think you did the right thing!!! You followed your gut, and did what your heart told you! ;) Good for you!! :) Sounds like this guy has a very good friend in you. ;)

    Jedi~Chick <33

  4. @Joshua: Well, in the end, that guy understood and accepted what I told him. :)

    @Leia and Jedi~Chick: I'm glad both of you think so cos I was rather unsure of wnat I wanted at first. :D


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